The Yankees Suck & Nearly Everyone Should Be Fired ASAP

I can’t watch this team anymore. It’s too pathetic. They simply cannot hit and score runs. They hit into more double plays than anyone else. Their fielding sucks. There’s no fire and no passion.

Gone are the days when Derek Jeter enjoyed himself out there on a daily basis and won all the time. Gone is the winning attitude I remember from David Wells, who got pulled from a game where they led by something like 15-1 after he finally gave up a run in the 8th inning or thereabouts, and his response to being pulled was to smash the phone in the dugout because he wanted to finish the game.

What do we get now? Half the lineup hitting below .200 and it’s JUNE. Inning killing strikeouts & shrugs as they lumber back to the dugout going 0-for-4 day after day.

What other team would still have Gardner or Frazier or Odor in the lineup at this point? Why does the lineup change order with every game? Why do players continually suck or go on the injured list every other day?

All this crap began when Boone took over. He should be fired. Now. This minute. Right when you’re reading this sentence. If it were George and not Hal Steinbrenner running the team, he would have been canned after this disaster of a weekend sweep by the Tigers, one of the worst teams in the league (the Yankees currently challenging them for that title). But instead we get another in the endless series of post-game pressers where Boone discusses how he’ll figure it out at some point. Add a few “Gee, all the data says we should be better than this” moments and you can see what’s going on.

He won’t figure out shit. He sucks as a manager. And the analytics schmucks who keep handing him whatever math they’ve pulled out their asses are also part of the problem, since they’re the ones actually running things. They’re the ones who built a lineup of 21st century Dave Kingmans, who either hit a solo homerun since no one else can get on base, or far more often just strike out.

I’ve said before that the training & conditioning coaches/staff should all be fired due to the incredible frequency of injuries to the team, and that still stands. Add to them the hitting coach.

I’d start by firing manager & coaches and then seeing what happened with the performance of the team. If it kept going like this, I’d go beyond my earlier opinions on getting rid of Sanchez and blow the entire team apart.

The only bright spot has been the pitching. But when you score less than 3 runs in 29 of your first 50 games, that good pitching is going to be wasted in barely holding on to a .500 record, basically where they are right now. The only team in the majors with fewer runs in more games are the Pirates.

Next up are series with Tampa and then Boston. I hope they get swept by both and score next to nothing. I hope they suck bad enough in the next few weeks that Boone & the inept coaching staff are finally booted and things can turn around. If not, there’s no way a team that came within a game of getting into the World Series before being cheated out of it will get that far again for the foreseeable future.

These games are painful to watch. And after a bullshit 60 game season and with covid bullshit finally ending, it’s even more painful to finally get baseball back with live crowds growing and have to watch a Yankee team that’s reminding me of the mid 80s group that always looked good on paper in April but sucked once things got going and wasted any strong performances by their best players like Mattingly then or Gerrit Cole now.

Bah.

FIRE THE GOD DAMN TRAINING AND CONDITIONING STAFF NOW

Luis Severino, who was the Yankees’ Cy Young finalist in 2018, and who got sidelined for nearly ALL of 2019 with some lame-ass labrum issue during spring training LAST year, is now slated for Tommy John surgery after throwing a small amount in only FUCKING FEBRUARY OF THIS YEAR.

Tommy John surgery means missing ALL of 2020 and a decent part of 2021.

Want more injuries? Aaron Judge, who should’ve won MVP over cheatin’ Altuve, is having “shoulder problems,” which in Yankee-speak means he’ll probably be sidelined until Labor Day.

Pile that on top of James Paxton, with friggin BACK SURGERY conducted a month ago as opposed to, oh, November maybe? He’ll be out until at least June.

Last year, a record THIRTY players from the Yankees went on the injured list. They still managed to win the division and lose to the Astros on stolen signs, but this is ridiculous. No other team in the league has this level of injuries, and as frequently.

The blame clearly lies with the training and conditioning, and whatever pharmaceuticals are being dispensed that numb minor pain before they turn major.

FIRE THEM ALL.

They should have been fired LAST year. And now we’re off to 2020, still in FUCKING FEBRUARY, and two of the best starting pitchers they have have been sidelined indefinitely, their perennial MVP hopeful “questionable.”

ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT.

I’m ready to fly to Tampa and personally pound the living shit out of their training and conditioning coaches. If I go on the injured list, it’s no big deal.

This was supposed to be the year – with signing Cole and everyone healthy, the Yankees should win north of 110 games. But this bullshit is already starting.

THIS RUINED MY WHOLE DAY and outweighed my fear of laboratory-grown Chinese germs heading our way. This just SUCKS.

BAH.

Random Thoughts 2/5/20

Item one: Pitchers & catchers haven’t even reported yet, and the Yankees reported today that pitcher James Paxton underwent back surgery to remove a tiny cyst and will be out for TWO TO THREE MONTHS.

Do the months November, December and January exist? Why the hell did they wait until now to do this surgery?

They replaced the pitching and hitting coaches last November. WHEN WILL THEY REPLACE THIS PATHETIC INCOMPETENT MEDICAL AND TRAINING STAFF who can’t prevent injuries?

That team is looking at somewhere around 110 wins if they stay healthy. And those morons are ALREADY messing it up before spring training even begins.

Item Two: Last night, I dreamed that John Wayne told me that he’d been to an educational conference up in Seattle and that Bill Gates kept talking about me and what I could do to help out with school choice. Wayne told me he also thought I was just the guy to do it, and that I had what it took as a man even if I “hung around with nerds,” in his words.

Not sure why I had that particular dream. I hadn’t been watching John Wayne movies, nor have I been in discussions or arguments over school choice issues recently.

Perhaps John Wayne has actually visited me in my dreams from beyond the afterlife, although I’d think he’d have better things do spend eternity on than wonky crap with Bill Gates & then seeking me out as if I’m the anointed one. On the other hand, maybe that’s his way out of purgatory. I’ll try to see if dreaming up a conversation with St. Thomas Aquinas tonight clears up that issue, and as long as I have the saint’s ear, I’ll ask him what the Yankees’ injury prognosis for the 2020 season is.

He probably roots for the Cardinals anyway.

Oh, I just crack myself up.

Item 3: RIP, Kirk Douglas. One of the last great old time movie stars. Here’s hoping you meet up with John Wayne and have some bourbon, come to think of it. Maybe you’ll turn up in my dreams someday, maybe it’ll be about tariffs or infrastructure instead of school choice, or maybe you’ll just ring my doorbell and try to sell me Girl Scout cookies.

Whatever it is, I hope that it’s like what must have been in your contract for countless movies, and you get to take your shirt off and scream at me.

“TRY THE SAMOAS, YOU DEGENERATE SADISTIC OLD MAN! AND YOU CAN GO TO HELL BEFORE I SELL YOU THIN MINTS NOW OR EVER AGAIN!”

To which I’d respond “I’m Spartacus!”

Then I’d tell him not to fight with Von Ellstein and direct “The Proud Land” himself. It’ll be a sure bomb that way.

Another Unemotional World Series, I Guess

I don’t know if there’s some sort of baseball award for most blown opportunities in a series, but the Yankees really deserve it for this year’s ALCS.

I won’t bother researching the Bill James stats or whatever they are to see if they set a record for men left on base or for the lowest batting average with runners in scoring position… but it sure feels like it. And defensively they were certainly erratic.

And give it up to the Astros – they took advantage of every mistake, made the most of practically every opportunity they had, sparkled in the field, and simply carried themselves like the team to beat. Too many of the Yankees looked confused and tired. A lot of times you can predict the winners of these things just by sensing the mood and attitude.

So I’ll watch what looks like to be a great matchup between the Astros and Nationals. Both teams have a pair of amazing starting pitchers, and I wonder if Nats manager Dave Martinez will do what he did to the Dodgers and stagger his pair of aces so that they don’t face the aces on the Astros. I guess we’ll see.

I’d have to give the edge to the Astros (who I figured to win it all once they signed Greinke, to be honest… but I have to root for my team and hope for the best… that’s what fandom is all about). The Astros have better hitting and balance, and probably a more reliable bullpen.

Yankees off-season will be interesting. I’m thinking they let Encanarcion go. Sabathia is retiring. I’m not sure if they’ll re-sign Gregorius with Andujar due back & the team overflowing with infielders, although I’d love to see him return. But with Urshela becoming what he has, and Voit doing well, and the wonderful addition of LeMehieu (probably the best move they made) along with future HOF Gleyber Torres out there… well, it’s a bit crowded.

What would I like to see in the off-season? Well, signing Garret Cole would sure be nice, although right now the 2020 starting rotation looks to be Severino – Tanaka – German – Paxton – Montgomery, and that’s not too bad. Bettances should return to the bullpen, too. But they can spend a billion dollars on free agents for all I care. I’m not paying for tickets and get to watch free on TV. Spend, spend, spend, I say!

Although all the “ifs” involved in that or any roster set up rely on avoiding the never-ending injuries that plagued nearly the entire team this year, so I think what I really want to see during the offseason is what I’ve wanted to see since maybe late April, that being for them to FIRE THE ENTIRE GOD DAMN STRENGTH AND TRAINING STAFF. Whatever the hell they’re doing, they’re doing in wrong. Guys miss half the year injured, like Judge – or the entire year like Stanton, only to come back and strain themselves AGAIN doing ordinary baseball stuff like running to first or swinging a bat. It’s ridiculous.

Another off-season move they should seriously consider is trading Gary Sanchez for pitching and prospects. They have other catchers who are perfectly fine, and the more I watched him this post-season the more I think he costs more than he provides, even when he hit better this year.

Cutting loose Jacoby Ellsbury and Greg Bird might be imminent as well.

So now to watch the World Series as merely a fan of the sport. Less stressful to be sure, but I don’t think it will affect my alcohol consumption during the games.

These Are The Times That Try Fans’ Souls

Watching the Yankees the past week has been an emotional chore. They’ve set a team record by allowing more than 73 runs in their last 7 games, not exactly the sort of record you want to set.

They can still score runs, if not enough to win, and they had some nice comebacks against the Twins, early on in this ongoing slog. But the Red Sox decimated them.

The pitching? Awful. Just awful. No one consistently pitches effectively. While sporting a weak starting rotation all year, they managed to finesse a wonderful record by a stars-all-align combo of people like German stepping up, across-the-board solid performances by overused bullpen names, and a lot of breaks going their way.

But these are the sorts of things that catch up with a team down the post-All Star break stretch, through August, when team pitching strength really makes the difference in which teams fade, collapse, or get to the finish line strong, ready for October battles between strong starting rotations.

Every team I can think of that started out the first half or 2/3 of the year looking amazing and then falling apart and collapsing by the end of the season all have the same thing in common: weak pitching. The ’64 Phillies overused their 2 main starters and blew a 6 1/2 game lead with only 12 to play. The ’69 Cubs, ’78 Red Sox, ’07 Mets, ’11 Red Sox… all cruised along early in the season, only to wither and fall by the wayside during the August-September stretch, all because of mediocre to poor pitching.

This week makes me think the 2019 Yankees could be added to this list – they got a 9 game lead right now, flirted with the best overall record in baseball, looked good against likely October competition like Houston, Tampa or Minnesota… but this past week… ugh. They look like crap.

CRAP I TELLS YA!

They have no stopper in the starting rotation. You won’t find a Guidry to chalk up a majority 25 wins after a Yankee loss like in ’78. When the bullpen door opens, Rivera will not appear to ensure the game is over, victory secured. Their best starter, German, seems effective but his win-loss record is a tad deceptive since they’ve come back in a few games where he got blown out early. Guidry he is not.

I thought they might stand pat before the trade deadline, but now it’s looking very likely they deal before the stroke of midnight July 31 for a starter, and the other teams know the price is going up for the Yankees when they’re playing like this. They’ll most likely give up some of the younger players and prospects I like just to get some above .500 pitcher with an ERA below 5, and that’s not good.

Severino, Montgomery and Bettances might come back before season’s end… but the odds of any of them being in top form after being injured so long are slim.

Can they rebound from this week’s doldrums? Sure, anything is possible. Signing some solid starter who rallies a clubhouse might happen. Standing pat, getting players back from the IL and coming together might happen.

I might also win the lottery. You never know. But in the meantime, Houston, Minnesota and Cleveland must be licking their chops.

Halls Of Fame Exist For Guys Like These

While sports heads constantly argue back and forth with hot, cold and lukewarm takes on who-was-better-than-who, it’s practically unheard of for someone to pretty much be unanimously accepted as the Best EVER at their particular position in the sport.

I can’t think of anyone making a serious argument for anyone other then Mariano Rivera as the best closer of all time, both in the regular and especially in the post-season. When the bullpen door opened and “Enter Sandman” blasted over the speakers at Yankee Stadium as Rivera took the mound to protect an 8th or 9th inning lead, you could see the opposing dugout simply shrug since they knew the game was over. The man was practically unhittable.

Yeah, I know… he’d been gotten to in a few key games in the post-season, like in the ’97 playoffs, ’01 series and ’04 against the Red Sox… nobody’s perfect. The Yankees winning championships in that period boiled down to whether or not Rivera got saves, and he most often did.

Most closers don’t last as long as he did, unless they’re knuckleballers like Hoyt Wilhelm. 18 seasons of consistency from closers is just unheard of – most of ’em have a few stellar seasons and then blow their arms out, or fail to fool hitters, or just lose control. The history of baseball is littered with guys who had one to a few amazing seasons as a lights-out closer and then vanished – I can think of all the ones I remember over the years – Bill Campbell, Eric Gagne, Tom Niedenfuer, Rawly Eastwick… the list goes on. And then there were the ones who had the staying power, the ones who most often made in into the Hall like Rivera: Eckersley, Sutter, Hoffman… but even those guys weren’t as good as Rivera.

Practically every other position in baseball presents a debate over who was the best ever: Catcher? Berra or Cochrane? Wait, what about Bench? Fisk? Maybe shortstop is easier… Wagner? Jeter? No, no… maybe Ripken. How can you compare different baseball eras, some will say. Even the greatest ever gets debated, by those in the Ruth camp and those offering various alternatives for assorted reasons.

Continue reading “Halls Of Fame Exist For Guys Like These”

And Now Judge

FIRE. THE. TRAINING. STAFF. NOW!!!!!

Left oblique injury. From SWINGING THE BAT AT THE PLATE.

Gee, good thing he doesn’t have to do that every game, huh?

He’s off to an MRI, and then to the injured list, along with practically the rest of the starting lineup.

And just to reassure us that this crap will continue, the Yankee announcers kept pushing their PR BS on how the Yankee Organization and the Steinbrenners would most CERTAINLY make sure the training regimens were state-of-the-art top-of-the-line bla bla bla so on and so forth.

Yeah, guys. It’s just bad luck. Bad luck over and over and over again with every player in the roster. Injuries resulting not from collisions or running into the wall, or getting beaned on a bone, but from SWINGING THE BAT, RUNNING INTO BASES or PITCHING BASEBALLS.

YOU STUPID BRAIN-DEAD PR FLACK SUCKUP MORONS.

Oh, and Aaron Boone still sucks as manager and also ought to be fired. The Red Sox being worse doesn’t excuse him either.

Ah yes, the Steinbrenners and the vaunted Yankee organization… they’d NEVER spend their enormous amounts of money on garbage would they? That certainly never happened with any of several dozen free agents over the years, huh?

Here’s a story: My dad had a longtime friend who made decent dough, and spent a lot of it on a spiffy new Jaguar luxury car. I certainly never got to see this car and I’m not sure my dad ever did either, since it was ALWAYS in the shop for repairs.

You know what you do when you have money and get stuck with a car like that, despite it’s impressive brand?

YOU BUY A DIFFERENT GOD DAMNED CAR.

FIRE. THE. TRAINING. STAFF. NOW!!!!!!



The New York Yankees Need Fixing Fast

And the doctor is in.

The Yankees, projected by many & hoped by me to win the AL East and beyond this year, have begun the 2019 season in a seemingly permanent state of suck.

They’ve been lucky (so far) that the Red Sox have followed suit, although today’s first 2019 match-up between the two makes me think that the Yankees will do their damndest to help the Sox out of their slump and send them off to the races after Tampa Bay. The Yankees’ problems boil down to two major categories: (1) Injuries and (2) Lackluster play.

Let’s start with (1) – since the end of spring break, the Yankees have lost to injuries: their #1 starting pitcher and Cy Young candidate Severino, #1 set-up reliever Bettances, starting center fielder Hicks, starting right fielder/DH MVP Stanton, the ENTIRE INFIELD of Sanchez, Tulowitzki, Gregorius, Andujar and now Bird. We fans get BS reports of 10 day injured list when the problems are clearly months long if not season ending.

Or in the case of Greg Bird’s torn left plantar fascia, possibly career ending. I recently wrote about the plantar fasciitis in my right foot. I just inflamed mine and I can barely walk on it late in the day. Bird tore that ligament in his left?? I’m sorry, but I think the poor guy might be done, and he was one of the players that often had me screaming at the TV for category (2) above.

Andujar rips a labrum in his shoulder sliding into 3rd? Most likely surgery and a season ender. A calf strain takes out Sanchez, a biceps strain takes out Stanton, lat strains have messed up Severino….

So AT WHAT POINT DO YOU FIRE THE TRAINER AND THE TRAINING STAFF?

Continue reading “The New York Yankees Need Fixing Fast”

Every Year The Yankees Do This To Me

Injuries, injuries everywhere. What kind of training regimen are these guys on that makes ’em so fragile? The season is only a few games old, and it seems like half the starting lineup is already on the IL or facing end-of-season surgery.

In Spring Training, Luis Severino and Aaron Hicks went down and I’m guessing from all the cryptic garbage we hear on their condition, won’t be back until late May at the earliest. Dellin Bettances out until mid-April. Didi Gregorius gone for most likely the entire season.

And now, Giancarlo Stanton out for a week with a biceps injury, and FAR worse, Miguel Andujar, last year’s shoulda-been rookie of the year, gets a torn up right shoulder that might require season ending surgery.

Last year it was Aaron Judge out for six weeks. Jordan Montgomery out for Tommy John surgery (hopefully back this summer).

These guys seem like they’re made of paper maché and glass. What gives? After a weekend of watching college kids take body-slam spills to the hardwood floor and get right back up again in the NCAAs (except for that poor kid on Auburn who ripped his ACL), why are baseball players so damn delicate?

Yeah, I know… maybe the call-ups from AAA like Frazier and Wade and German can become another Andujar-esque surprise, but I’m not holding my breath. They got a relatively easy schedule to start the season – only a 2 game Red Sox series and a series with the Astros loom large alongside teams like Baltimore, Detroit, Kansas City, the Angels and San Francisco… but how many holes can be filled at once?

Though somehow, watching Sonny Gray have a classic Sonny Gray Yankee-like start for the Reds the other day (walks in runs, over 80 pitches by the middle of the 3rd and gets pulled) gave me some hope that the roster this year’ll be better. Sanchez looks like he’s hitting again. Greg “Mr. March” Bird doesn’t look too pathetic, at least not yet. New additions James Paxton and Adam Ottovino are both pitching well. Sabathia returns soon from his suspension. And the Red Sox are off to a bad start.

But they gotta stay healthy. This is getting ridiculous.

BTW, I found the photo above on this smartass’ dormant Yankee-hating blog, which I must admit made me laugh scrolling through it. It’s funny the intense emotions something as silly as sports bring out of people.

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