A Tasty Culinary Abomination

This one felt wrong when I looked at the interior of my fridge and thought of it, but I gotta say… it was beyond easy and tasted really good. <insert your own joke here>

I made what I can only refer to as “California Roll Soft Tacos.”

Let’s be honest, sushi people – California roll is ALREADY an abomination. One of the better long-gone sushi bars of Los Angeles, Sushi Nozawa, would actually THROW YOU OUT if you ordered it.

But what can I say? I’ll eat any kind of seafood if it tastes decent. Kinda like the way I’m a total pasta gourmet and snob, but would still snarf down Kraft mac ‘n’ cheese out of a box or even Chef Boyardee.

So I had some fake crabmeat I’d figured on making some simple sammiches with, but instead, I did this:

  1. Chopped up said fake crabmeat and tossed with mayo, set aside
  2. Took 2 avocados, mashed ’em up with some lemon juice and salt, set aside
  3. Seeded/sliced up some cucumber into long strips, as well as some shredded carrot – set aside.
  4. Made a quick abomination of sushi rice – basically, 1/2 cup of rice rinsed until the water was reasonably clear, cooked in cup of water – bring to boil, simmer until mostly done, then let sit off heat for 10 minutes. Then I mixed it with a tablespoon of vinegar rice. Set aside.
  5. Warmed up some flour tortillas, soft taco size.
  6. Assembly! A layer of the rice in the tortilla, followed by pressing the crab, avocado into it, then the cucumber and carrot.
  7. Rolled it up tight and alternated between sprinkling soy sauce or tabasco on it, in between bites.

And it was DAMN GOOD.

Certainly a good thing to do with the fake crab from now on. And, minus the hint of salt/crisp from the seaweed wrapper of an actual California Roll, pretty much the same affect.

And considering how I got all the major ingredients at the local Aldi…. DIRT CHEAP!

I’m sure if I wanted to spring for actual sushi quality fish, the same sushi-burrito motif would work just fine with a tweak here and there with the other ingredients. And yes, I did miss the picked ginger, although I mostly eat that as a palate cleanser when switching between fish at an actual sushi bar.

I keep wondering if dim sum or a sushi bar will be my first long sit-down restaurant meal once this covid bullshit is over with. But in the meantime… I guess I’ll try to come up with more stuff like this.

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