Every day for the past several weeks in my inbox or spam folder…. another email or two from “Ben Watson.”
Ben Watson wants me to claim my $1500 Wal-Mart award. Ben Watson has reviewed my job application and I should click on the link. Ben Watson warns me it’s my last chance to claim my Amazon reward.
I’m not alone, either. Ben Watson is cheating on me by spamming countless others who have searched Google or whatever to find out wtf is going on and then landed here on what’s become quite a popular post. If that’s you, welcome! Feel free to look around – click on the topics above for other stuff I’ve written about and be sure to check out my books! That will make me very happy.
And speaking of happy, Ben Watson wants me to click on the link for discount Viagra. I thought only Google and Facebook were datamining and spying on me. Who knew former Patriots tight end Ben Watson was behind it all?
I always liked him as a player on the Pats, who let him go as a free agent once they knew they had Gronk in the offing, I guess. He went to the Browns, the Saints, the Ravens and then back to the Saints again before announcing his retirement a few weeks back.
And when he does stuff like publicly call out Roger Goodell over the dumbfounding non-call in the NFC championship game, I like him even more, since as any good Patriot fan will tell ya, Goodell SUCKS.
BUT WHY ARE YOU SPAMMING MY INBOX, BEN????
Unless you actually ARE simultaneously running rewards programs for Amazon, Target and Wal-Mart WHILE examining resumés on LinkedIn AND selling Viagra AND Bosley hair treatments AND working for assorted banks I don’t have accounts with yet need me to click links to check on fraud…. no matter what sort of obvious email spam you could think of, I’ve gotten one in the last few weeks from “Ben Watson” as the return address. You’d think these idiots would be more creative than that… or else it really IS YOU Ben Watson, sending me all these things!
No wonder you needed to retire from the NFL. You’re just too damned busy.
Hmm…. unless I’m wrong, and it’s this guy who is actually spamming me.
Might just be…. I really don’t follow Premier League or care about soccer in general. He must be trying to get my attention.
I think I’ll go on playing hard to get.