Don’t Listen To That Shiksa, Moses! You’re Meant For So Much More!

Didn’t you see how she screwed around with Margot Channing’s marriage?

She’ll play two different villains on Batman fer chrissakes!

DON’T DO IT!

Get in touch with your SECRET INNER JEW!

Cross the desert, it’ll be worth it, Lily Munster awaits!

ABC’s annual airing of the Jewish Wizard of Oz will be tomorrow night, the Saturday before Easter, as it is every year.

And I always wind up watching all or a decent part of it. Yeah, I know…. over the top scenery chewing, incredibly stilted dialogue, bla bla bla….

I DON’T CARE!!! I FUCKING LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!

Moses, Jewish law AND God versus a lineup of villains played by Vincent Price, Edward G. Robinson and Yul Brynner? How can you not LOVE that??

They loved it in 1956, and you’ll love it today!

It’s how I want my Bible movies, too. I don’t want them to look like reality, especially the earlier you go in the Bible. The cinematic landscape has to transcend reality towards the imagination of the spiritual. DeMille’s epic scale, amazing use of color and imagery – combined with the clunkiness of silent-era style actor blocking and shot framing all come together to produce such a landscape. Other Bible films don’t measure up. I like lots of  ’em too – both the silent DeMille and Nicholas Ray versions of King of Kings, Zefferelli’s TV miniseries Jesus of Nazareth,  as well as quasi-Bible films like Ben-Hur… but none of them resonate in the memory like The Ten Commandments does.

Especially when you watch the damn thing every year for decades. I must have seen this film three dozen times by now.

So have a Happy Passover, everyone. And a Happy Easter to all the goyim! Remember, The Last Supper was a Passover Seder. I bet Judas cheated to find the afikomen and get a shekel from Jesus. It would be in character.

So let it be written, so let it be done!

 

 

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