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A-Roid February 8, 2009

Posted by Jim Berkin in Baseball.
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struckoutSo now we find out that A-Rod had a positive steroid test back in 2003 with the Rangers, despite his telling the Mitchell commission that he had never taken them. Well, they weren’t banned by baseball back in ’03 but does that mean we can trust him on not taking them since?

If they truly are performance-enhancing, he always has a good argument that he never took them in any given October.

If they turn up in his whizz now, he could always claim they are simply the dregs of Madonna’s residue.

More importantly, the guy who may as well wear a sign that says “I will make it IMPOSSIBLE for you to root for me, Yankee fans” has tainted his impressive career numbers, along with home run stats that gave us hope that Bonds’ total LIE of 762 career dingers would be erased from the record books along with its well-deserved asterisk. The cost of baseball’s deal with the devil back in the go-go ’90s to fill seats and promote the sport via the overly-live homerun ball while ignoring the large role of performance enhancing drugs that would put Jim Morrison to shame continues to be paid, and paid and paid again. So far the only reckoning available are the Hall of Fame denials – so far to McGwire, perhaps later on to Clemens… can nothing else be done to FIX THIS GOD DAMN GAME ALREADY?

And here I was, sitting pretty, all ready to watch the Yankees buy another pennant. What could be purer than that?

At least he spoke up today and finally decided to man up and admit it, instead of the usual “ask my agent” or “ask the players’ union” cop-out. Maybe the notion that no less than FOUR different sources named him let him know just how popular he is. From a legal standpoint, he might have grounds for an invasion-of-privacy lawsuit, but when you look like this much of a sleaze, I wouldn’t bet on him filing it.

His only chance for redemption in the eyes of fans will be to hit the crap out of the ball all year long, hit it twice as hard in October to be the deciding factor in a Yankees’ series win, especially in clutch situations – and then whizz into a cup that the CDC will pronounce as pure as the yellow snow in front of a panel headed by Dr. Drew, Dr, Phil and the reanimated body of Joe DiMaggio.

Don’t hold your breath for any of that. Bah.

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