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The Michael Phelps Diet August 13, 2008

Posted by Jim Berkin in Food.
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So while I’ve been cutting way back on portion sizes and so forth to keep myself down to anywhere from 1000-1500 calories a day to keep losing weight, I’m greeted this morning by the 12,000 calorie a day diet of all-time-great Olympian Michael Phelps:

Phelps lends a new spin to the phrase “Breakfast of Champions” by starting off his day by eating three fried-egg sandwiches loaded with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, fried onions and mayonnaise.
He follows that up with two cups of coffee, a five-egg omelet, a bowl of grits, three slices of French toast topped with powdered sugar and three chocolate-chip pancakes.
At lunch, Phelps gobbles up a pound of enriched pasta and two large ham and cheese sandwiches slathered with mayo on white bread – capping off the meal by chugging about 1,000 calories worth of energy drinks.
For dinner, Phelps really loads up on the carbs – what he needs to give him plenty of energy for his five-hours-a-day, six-days-a-week regimen – with a pound of pasta and an entire pizza.
He washes all that down with another 1,000 calories worth of energy drinks.

Wait, THAT’S what I have to do in order to have abs like Phelps’ and win Gold Medals?? COOL! BRING ON THE PASTA AND PIZZA AND…

Hold on, I also have to sprint swim five hours a day, six days a week? But I’d have to wait a half an hour after eating before going in the water or else I’d cramp up.

And the water goes up my nose and it stings.

I don’t think the chlorine is good for my hair, either.

Wait a sec, I’d have to put myself through this training routine of Phelps?? Are you CRAZY??? No wonder the guy burns 12,000 calories a day! Besides, I think there’s something good on TV…

I’ll stick to my diet. I’m only a couple of pounds away from my target weight anyway since I’ve been a good boy. Sigh.

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