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The Michael Phelps Diet August 13, 2008

Posted by Jim Berkin in Food.

So while I’ve been cutting way back on portion sizes and so forth to keep myself down to anywhere from 1000-1500 calories a day to keep losing weight, I’m greeted this morning by the 12,000 calorie a day diet of all-time-great Olympian Michael Phelps:

Phelps lends a new spin to the phrase “Breakfast of Champions” by starting off his day by eating three fried-egg sandwiches loaded with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, fried onions and mayonnaise.
He follows that up with two cups of coffee, a five-egg omelet, a bowl of grits, three slices of French toast topped with powdered sugar and three chocolate-chip pancakes.
At lunch, Phelps gobbles up a pound of enriched pasta and two large ham and cheese sandwiches slathered with mayo on white bread – capping off the meal by chugging about 1,000 calories worth of energy drinks.
For dinner, Phelps really loads up on the carbs – what he needs to give him plenty of energy for his five-hours-a-day, six-days-a-week regimen – with a pound of pasta and an entire pizza.
He washes all that down with another 1,000 calories worth of energy drinks.

Wait, THAT’S what I have to do in order to have abs like Phelps’ and win Gold Medals?? COOL! BRING ON THE PASTA AND PIZZA AND…

Hold on, I also have to sprint swim five hours a day, six days a week? But I’d have to wait a half an hour after eating before going in the water or else I’d cramp up.

And the water goes up my nose and it stings.

I don’t think the chlorine is good for my hair, either.

Wait a sec, I’d have to put myself through this training routine of Phelps?? Are you CRAZY??? No wonder the guy burns 12,000 calories a day! Besides, I think there’s something good on TV…

I’ll stick to my diet. I’m only a couple of pounds away from my target weight anyway since I’ve been a good boy. Sigh.



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